Last week, I had a special request to write a post on the idea of love at work. Much of what I write is relevant to all situations. Why? Because if you are taking your whole self to work, there won’t be a substantial difference between the professional and personal persona.
Having said that, what do you do when you have difficult colleagues, a challenging boss or an unreasonable Managing Director? Perhaps you feel you can’t express yourself as freely as you would do at home.
How do you stay calm, centred and loving when the demands are high, time is short and company politics rife? Is love really compatible with the corporate world?
If you are familiar with my blog, you will already know that I believe our true nature is that of love. (Read my earlier post “Your True Self ~ Finding Your Way Home” if you missed it).
Our natural birthright is to be happy and loving and any time we find ourselves feeling or behaving differently, we can know that other forces are at play.
So what gets in the way? We have all had the experience of bipping merrily along our path when some inconsiderate or cruel person says or does something that offends or upsets us and “BANG!” — our joy comes crashing down!
We fall into the ‘if only” pattern… “if only they hadn’t said that, if only they hadn’t done that, if only they weren’t in my life, if only they didn’t work here, if only _____________” and so on and so on.
Our reactions may range from sadness, hurt or vulnerability to frustration, anger or revenge.
The tendency is to blame the other person but closer examination reveals that what has taken us away from our loving nature is our own emotional response. Therefore, our biggest concern should not be their behaviour or attitude but rather how easily we have been taken off track.
We might not want to hear this. It may well be true that you that you have difficult and awkward people to work with. But it is a story created by the intellectual reasoning of the mind that thinks being loving and centred comes from being in control of your circumstances and environment.
Your heart knows differently. Anyone who ever fell hopelessly and completely in love for no apparent reason knows that being in control is never a part of feeling love.
Your head will try to manage the problem. It turns to the toolkit of the mind. Let’s contemplate, analyse and fix what is wrong. It will fight to regain control of the situation.
The resources of the mind may be well developed but they are seriously limited. And the more you are in your head, the further you get from your heart — which, by the way, already knows the perfect solution if you could let go of the story long enough to listen to the words of love.
So now an opportunity presents itself. The next time you experience a reason to be less than loving at work, you know that the issue doesn’t lie with anyone else. Instead we can turn our attention to the connection with our hearts.
In the moment that someone acts badly towards you or says something unfair, what makes you want to stop loving you? Are you really going to let someone else come between you and your heart?
So experiencing love at work is entirely possible. We just have to be completely committed to self-love.
When the invitations come to be unloving — the less than constructive criticism, the tactless request, the pointless meetings, the misconceptions or the injustice, just let the story of the mind go. Your heart will advise that the only reasonable response is to ask yourself gently, “is this worth falling out of (self) love for?”